Protect Them At All Costs: A Father's Mission

Written by Keith Sciarillo, Late Discovery Adult Adoptee, C.A.S.E. Emerging Leader Alumni

Published on: Jun 16, 2025

Category Fatherhood

When something happens to me, it affects them. That is my take on fatherhood in a nutshell. Our children are an extension of us and sometimes a reflection, too. Everything matters: from who we allow into our lives to how we take care of our mental, spiritual, and physical well-being. In my not-so-humble opinion, the goal is to be here as long as possible for them, to help them thrive. Beyond being a protector and provider, there is an obligation to pass down all the wisdom we’ve collected throughout the years — especially the lessons learned from mistakes so that history doesn’t repeat itself.

Then there are also the experiences that are beyond our control….

Discovering my adoption 12 years ago had a direct impact on my kids, who were 9 and 3 at the time. It wasn’t just about the newfound knowledge. The layers of identity, the extended family, and new information about my cultural and medical background all became very relevant throughout the years. Sure, we are all our own people, but roots matter. They matter, but they don’t define us. How we choose to navigate those life-altering experiences can shape the path for generations to come. We can change the course. Watching my kids walk boldly through the shattered remnants of roadblocks in my past has been the most rewarding part of fatherhood. Life will still challenge them, but they won’t stumble over anything I left behind.

More recently, I’ve been facing the greatest challenge yet: A disease called sarcoidosis. It manifests differently for everyone. For me, it’s affecting my bile ducts, liver, lungs, heart, eyes, and bones. With treatment, it’s mostly manageable, but some damage is already done. One promise I made to myself is that this disease will not take my peace of mind. My family relies on it. And I need it in order for me to be present for them. Honestly, throughout this journey, it has also been important for my kids to understand this condition so they can protect themselves. The doctors say that there is a genetic component but also environmental. Stress can be a major trigger as well.

I’ll conclude with a few analogies…When a pebble hits a pond, there will be ripples, but eventually the water settles. Being a father is to be a constant stream that filters so that the best parts can continue to flow.

Happy Father’s Day!