5 Meaningful New Years Resolutions for Adoptive Parents

According to Columbia University, only about 25% of people who make resolutions for the new year are still committed to them after 30 days, and only 10% accomplish them. Those numbers are bleak.

For 2025, let us reimagine these as goals instead of resolutions — a way toward positive changes rather than berating ourselves for past mistakes. The focus? Achieving a more balanced approach to adoptive parenting and the relationships between ourselves, our families, and our lives.

#1: We will try a new approach with our children.

Whether it is a strategy learned from a podcast, a webinar like C.A.S.E.’s Strengthening Your Family webinar series, or a blog post—give it a try. If you haven’t seen progress using the same tired approach, it might be time to try something new.

#2: We will fully embrace the idea of repair.

Many of us may have grown up in a home where hearing “I’m sorry” from adults was uncommon or even nonexistent. Repairing after harsh words, a disagreement, or a misunderstanding is essential. This not only strengthens the bond with our children, but it also teaches them how to repair when they have made a mistake with others. If we do not model this for our children, where do we expect them to learn it?

#3: We will stop falling victim to the comparison trap.

This is a tough one. Take a thorough look at your life, interactions with others, social media, etc.—where do you find yourself in the comparison trap? Maybe it is time you take a break from whatever or whoever makes you feel less than. President Theodore Roosevelt once said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” If we can shy away from comparing our lives to others, maybe that will come with the added bonus of experiencing more joy.

#4: We will have compassion for ourselves.

Making mistakes in our relationships is inevitable. While we might be proficient at repairing with others (see #2), what do we tell ourselves when something goes wrong? The way we speak to ourselves is just as important as the way we speak to others. Each time you catch yourself putting yourself down for a mistake, ask yourself if you would say those same things to your child, your friend, your co-worker. If the answer is no, then you should reframe what you are saying to yourself.

#5: We will prioritize making connections with families similar to your own.

When your family gets together with friends, are you the only adoptive family? Do your children have friends who are also adopted? It might be more comfortable to continue to run in the same circles you always have, but what about the comfortability of your children? They need to see other families like theirs. Many adoptees feel as though their differences stick out to others, especially if they are transracial adoptees. When they do not interact or spend time with other adopted people, it is challenging for them to ever feel they belong.

As we step into 2025, let’s embrace these goals not as checkboxes, but as opportunities to grow together as adoptive families. Whether it’s trying new approaches, fostering compassion, or building meaningful connections, each step we take is a powerful commitment to ourselves and our children. Change takes time, and progress may come in small, steady waves, but every effort is a victory worth celebrating. Here’s to a year of mindful parenting, stronger bonds, and shared joy as we navigate this journey together.